Adventure Day! August 28th 2017 Martinsburg WV

No pictures to show for this months adventure.  My mom broke her arm almost 2 months ago and I've been very busy helping her.  I've also been working on myself to become healthier and to claim the life I deserve.  I'm working on creating the love I deserve as well.  From others and from myself.  All this is extremely exhausting.  So this months "adventure" was simply taking a nap and going to therapy.

Sometimes you just have to listen to what your body needs.  What your mind needs.

I had originally planned on going to the C&O Canal- but the little museum is closed on Mondays and I just didn't feel like going.

Self care is giving your mind and body what it really craves and needs.

Until Next Time.

I have started going to therapy.

I'm hoping to heal some very sad and very deep wounds.  I've been twice.  I'm tired.  I'm exhausted even with not being myself.

I've done a lot of work on my own, but I need help now.

I'm important enough to get that help.

Until Next Time.

July Adventure! Hiking at the Gambrill State Park, Frederick Maryland- or also known as "the day I damn near killed myself"

Don't let these smiles fool you.  It was July 24th 2017 and this is moments before I stepped on the Green Trail in the Gambrill State Park in Maryland--

Moments before I damned near killed myself. 

I wasn't really excited about my adventure this month.  My mother had hurt her shoulder recently and the extra work helping her was stressful so I made myself get out into the woods to clear my head.  Good idea right?  Riiiiiight. 

It started out well enough.  It was hot, but cooler in the woods.  The scenery was nice.  The street noise I was grumbling about hearing finally faded away. During this nice time I didn't notice that I had been heading down hill the whole time.  

The first hill heading back up out of wherever I was was harder than it looked.  Half way up I had to stop to catch my breath, lose the hat and the cute pink hiking shirt I was wearing over my cotton tshirt. Did I mention that I was carrying a backpack that weighed about 5 lbs?  It may have only been 5lbs, but it felt like a freakin' brick on my back.  

By the time I finished the second hill I was close to a panic. My heart was racing.  I was shaky. I was sweating up a storm.  My mouth was dry. Panic took over making it hard for me to even think clearly.  I had convinced myself that there was no way I was strong enough to go up ANOTHER hill- which right in front of me was another steep hill.  I felt like I had really put myself in serious danger.   Luckily I had plenty of water and a banana.  and a yogurt.  Lucky again, two ladies came who were both older than me to also stop and rest for a minute to give me back my hat that I didn't even realize I had dropped.  They had let me know that I had another mile to go before I was through (it was about a 2 mile hike) BUT if I could just make it up that last hill-- the worst would be over.  It flattened out after this one last hill.  There was a small inlcine after that but there was hope.  

That's what I needed.  Encouragement from these ladies was my saving grace.  I don't know what I would've done if they hadn't told me-  you can do it!  One last hill!  It's hard to tell how long I would've sat there scared to death.  This picture is half way up that last hill.  I kept saying to myself- just get to that boulder then you can rest.  While I rested I calmed a bit and was able to enjoy a small view through the trees.  Yep.  I was definitely high up.  

The trail DID flatten out.  It became  rugged and thin and I felt like a serious hiker.  Still reeling from my experience I felt a little bit of pride that I did indeed survive those hills.  

I sat and rested at this monument along the trail.  This is when I really started to relax again.  I knew I was back to where if I needed help I could easily call out and someone would be able to hear me.  I was so weirded out by this hike that I didn't even notice that there was a place to stand and look at a huge overlook.  I caught my breath and sat for a few minutes before moving on.  

I can't say that I enjoyed anything about this hike.  The first few blissful yards were nice because I didn't realize what I had done to myself.  Once I hit that first hill the hike went from relaxing and mind clearing to scarey as shit and get me back to my Subaru! I want this over.  

I was THRILLED to see this sign.  When I finally finished I wasn't excited.  I didn't get that HELL YEAH! I JUST DID THAT feeling.  I didn't feel empowered.  I felt weak, small and horribly humbled to the fact of how out of shape I am.  

I felt like a failure. Sure, I was happy.  Sure I had a bit of a bad ass swagger when I went into Sheetz afterward to pee.  But looking back on it now-  the feeling of failure stole my glory.

Who do you think you are- stole my glory.  You shouldn't have been out there in the first place- stole my glory.  

Honestly I haven't felt the same way about hiking since.  Recalling this hike makes me nervous again.  

I haven't decided if its a good thing or a bad thing but it has made me realize that I may want to stick with nature walker instead of hiker.  

I had a glorious time in Greenbrier the previous month.  That was significantly easier and waaaaay more relaxing.  Yet, I still got some good exercise.  

So with all this being said, I am planning on walking (not hiking) on the C&O canal and go through the museum for my adventure in August.  That will be a heck of a lot less stressful.  

Until Next Time.  

That day we enjoyed a slow summer day with shopping and a movie! July 2017

Sometimes you just need to slow down, go window shopping and a movie.  Oh and also take cringy pictures with Five Nights At Freddies characters to annoy your teenage son.

I still had a gift card to the movies from Christmas and this was the day we finally agreed on a movie to see together. 

Well, almost together. 

We went to see Guardians of the Galaxy 2-  It was so fun.  I really just relaxed and enjoyed the show.  The part I didn't like was paying nearly $36 for popcorn candy and soda.  That's how they make their money apparently. So, note- the 3 of us going to the movies costs $100--

After the movie we had some energy for more window shopping.  It was pretty hot on this July day so we were happy to do things indoors. 

I had a wonderful day--- it was so nice to just enjoy something as simple as going to a movie.  My anxiety that day was simply non existent- which is weird because usually being in a dark theatre causes me to be more anxious- but not this time.  I actually sat back and thought to myself-- life is so good.  I'm having fun.  and for someone with anxiety, that's a home run.

Enjoy small moments. 

Until Next Time.   

That day we went to Cooter's and Daisy's Diner-- Luray, Virginia June 19th 2017

We heard that the Dukes of Hazzard inspired museum/diner had recently opened in Luray Virginia.  It is named "Cooter's" after the name of the mechanic on the show.  We were excited to arrive  just before a big storm was set to come through.  We were a bit disappointed with the Daisy's Diner because really it was just a convenience store with some good food choices. 

We ordered our food and sat down to wait for them to call our names.  Now that I think about it, I don't ever recall Daisy ever being in a diner on the show.  I only recall her walking around in her super short cut off blue jeans tempting the hearts of all the males on and off the show.  The food was good but it seriously lacked in diner.  Buyer Beware.

I didn't take a picture of the museum itself or the gift shop.  I wish I had.  The museum itself other than the replica of Cooter's garage was basically a collection of Dukes of Hazzard toys that was what looked like a scrounged up collection from a lucky flea market seller.  They did have a giant screen TV playing the show so it was fun to see that silly show again.  (and now that I've seen it- how offensive it was!) 

The last bit was the gift shop.  This is the money maker for the whole place.  $6 for a cheap keychain?  Um, I'll pass.  I noticed that the most of the could be offensive confederate flag stuff (including bikini) was in a small section in the back.  Everything else was average gift shop stuff- shot glasses, $12 plastic waterbottles, tshirts, hoodies and the must have coffee mug. 

We had hoped to be there for a couple hours, but even with eating our lunch we were in and out in about hour to hour and a half.  Not the day trip experience we were expecting. 

I'm glad we went though.  I'm sure they'll stay in business cause where else can you see an authentic Dukes of Hazzard Fun Tunnel????

Until Next Time.